by
Chaplain Kathie
Travelers are heading back to their homes after their annual trip to celebrate Thanksgiving with family and friends. Most of the left overs are gone and Christmas shopping lists are checked against sales. Boxes come down from the attic, out of the basement and garages, containing treasured decorations along with the mess of tangled lights we should have packed more carefully. Christmas cards are being signed to let people know we're still thinking of them even though most people on our lists are forgotten about the rest of the year. We don't call most of them. We don't really email them unless we're passing on another chain email. It's really easy to hit the forward button instead of writing a personal note to them.
This time of the year, we manage to think of people in our lives. We manage to want to make them happy. We also manage to think of the reason most of us call ourselves Christian no matter if we faithfully attend church services or not. Somehow the CEO in us will guilt us into going. (Christmas and Easter Only)
Some of us gathered together Thursday for a Thanksgiving feast. Hours of cooking special foods, checking the silverware, unloading our best china to put on the perfect table and we breathed a sigh of relief when the turkey didn't dry out and we didn't burn the rolls. We sat with family and friends closest to us, bowed our heads as someone said grace and we gave thanks for the meal. For some families, Thanksgiving is the only time of the year where this seems natural. The rest of the year, we never even think of saying it.
What is the matter with us?
Do we say grace every time we put food in our mouths? Isn't it just as important to thank God for being able to feed ourselves all the time? Do we say thanks when we pull up to a fast food window as we reach into our wallets to pay for it? Do we say thanks when we reach into the refrigerators or cabinets for a late night snack? No, most of us don't. So why do we remember to be thankful on this one day out of the year?
Why is it that we only remember the people we send cards to once a year? Why do we think of making someone else happy this time of the year but not during the rest of the year?
This time of year, people volunteer to help the needy and the homeless by showing up to help them feel they have not been forgotten. While this is wonderful, they are still hungry and needy the rest of the year as well but we forget them. We are just too busy to be reminded of them, to notice them, to feel compassion for them.
What is the matter with us?
The last two months of the year are just about the only time we think of how much God has blessed us other than Easter but we don't manage to do all we do for Thanksgiving and Christmas for others on Easter. Why? Easter is the time of the year we honor the greatest gift of all. The day Christ sacrificed His life for all mankind. It is when we honor His life of mercy and compassion even though He knew the very people He would heal and feed, would be responsible for calling for Him to be crucified. The same man who healed the Roman Centurion's servant would be nailed to the beams insuring His death by Roman hands. None of that stopped Him from thinking of and taking care of others at all times. He even thought of others in His last moments on earth when He said "Father forgive them for they know not what they do." but we however seem to forget the homeless, the needy, the sick, the elderly and the imprisoned He came to heal.
What is the matter with us?
Saying grace is about being thankful for what we have and not about thinking we deserve what we have. We must always acknowledge that those who have less, have the same needs we do but have not had the same opportunities we do. A lot of people lost their jobs over the last few years through no fault of their own. Some of them lost their homes as well. Did they deserve to suffer the losses? Did their children deserve to lose their sense of security? Did any of them deserve to go from self-sufficiency to depending on the kindness of strangers? Do we really think they deserved to suffer? Christ didn't. After all, He was homeless, jobless and depending on the kindness of strangers to feed Him and shelter Him. He came not to make money off of everyone He helped. He did not take care of the rich and powerful because of what they could do for Him. He took care of those in need of being reminded they were loved by God even though they had hard lives and could give back nothing of material value.
We however manage to donate to charities more this time of year than any other time of the year. What's the matter with us?
We value wealth thinking the people with it someone deserve more. We value beautiful people and turn away in disgust when we see a homeless person with their hand out. We somehow manage to believe that if anyone deserves to be acknowledged for what they know and what they do, they will be and they need no help from us to receive it. Yes, this happens all the time.
Volunteers give of their time and the saying time is money holds true because that time they give, they could be earning more money working for a paycheck. Most will struggle trying to pay their own bills as they think of others first. They wonder where the money will come from to support them as they support others forgotten by the multitude moving on. I know this feeling well. I had a job and was able to pay my bills as I volunteered countless hours helping veterans and their families heal. Then I lost my job because of the economy and the church used volunteers instead of paying my salary. I still volunteered, became a chaplain, invested hundreds of dollars in this plus money traveling where I was needed, when I was needed. The difference was, I had no extra money coming in to pay for any of it. My family has been suffering financially ever since and we're going on two years as I search for financial support or a job.
I reached out to some of the organizations I belong to for financial help. One of them had a telling comment behind my back after I asked for help. The person believed that if I knew what I was talking about, I wouldn't need to ask for help. It never dawned on him that while I was there where I was needed, no one was there when I needed help from them, including him. Did I deserve less help than he did? Did I deserve to be turned away when in his own life he was helped greatly by others to get to where he was? He even stated that the veterans I was helping should just be left in the hands of the VA to take care of them.
I know about PTSD because I live with it in my family, studied it for over twenty five years and spent time with the veterans people like him avoided. What I never knew what how to support myself doing this or how to gain contacts that would believe in what I do. I cannot publicize the veterans I help because of honoring their privacy. I cannot scream out that today I helped a family cope or today I saved a life. While this may all be worthy to God and the people I help, some powerful people would rather let God take care of my needs instead of them. This does not mean I deserve less help or deserve to suffer because someone with the ability to help refuses to. It happened when Christ walked the earth and the poor were not fed by the rich and powerful. It happened when He wanted to spend time with them instead of spending time with the wealthy and powerful. When we refuse to help one person, there is a long line of people behind them waiting for their help. We do not avoid helping just the one we see with their hand out, but avoid helping all they have been helping as well.
Most of the people that lost jobs used to give to charities, help others in need but we see them as suddenly of lesser value than when they were giving. I often wonder what happened to the people refusing to help Christ with food and shelter when they had all they needed. Did they end up having everything they had taken away from them? When we refuse to help, God does not look kindly on us. When we say grace only for certain meals, it is as if we are ungrateful for the rest of them. When we think of others only a few months out of the year, it is as if they really don't matter to us at all. When we judge those we think deserve what they get, don't deserve our help all year long, we should be praying we don't get what we deserve in return.
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